


Help, Theres A Gun In My Yarn Stash

by ariane221b



Category: Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Crack, Crafts, F/M, Fluff, Knitting, Ravlery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-19
Updated: 2012-06-20
Packaged: 2017-11-08 03:37:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/438710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariane221b/pseuds/ariane221b
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It turns out Clint can knit, which of course the rest of the team is going to exploit. And (as usual), not tell Tony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cobwebs

“Barton, what the hell are you doing?”

  
Natasha was sat in one of the large armchairs in Clints room, legged tucked underneath her her, the file from their latest mission together open in her lap, from where she had been reading over the completion notes.This was not an uncommon arrangement for them; when they were off-task they tended to stay with the rest of their team, in the newly constructed Potts Tower, and while they had their own rooms, when there was only one person in the world who you really trusted, you tended to keep them close. 

  
So, here they were; her doing file check, he sprawled across the bed, apparently fiddling with some string. 

  
“Barton... are you... knitting?”

  
The other agent flicked his head backwards to peer at her, upside down. “Problem Tash?”

  
“No, I just didn’t take you for the granny sort...”

  
He attempted to shrug, but upside down, it came out as more of a wiggle. “One of the acrobats taught me in the circus. It kept me from doing target practice with the clowns hats.” He grinned, and looked back to the bundle of thin black yarn and needles in his hands. “You should try it some time; you might make a cute little spider web, or a vodka cosy, or whatever.”

  
She rolled her eyes at the back of his head. “You know perfectly well I’ve never knitted in my life Clint.” 

  
He grinned at her again. “Like to try?”

  
She hesitated for a moment, automatically wanting to say no, piss off, can you make me some herbal tea. But the file was boring, and knitting could potentially be useful, she supposed. So she nodded, and couldn’t help but laugh at how cheerful it made Clint look. He flipped himself over (somehow keeping hold of the yarn in his hand) and sat on the edge of the bed, gesturing for her to sit on the floor. 

  
She settled herself against his legs, and allowed him to wrap his arms around her shoulders, to hold the knitting in front of her. She took the needles from him, and he carefully guided her thin hands, teaching her how to wind the yarn to make fabric. As with most things, she picked it up quickly, and soon he was watching over the top of her head, as she created the tiny stitches, slightly mesmerised by her own work. 

  
It wasn’t long before he was teaching her basic ribbing, and then casting off. 

  
“So, enjoy that?”

  
“I did, actually. It was... relaxing?” 

  
He laughed. “Come on,” He put his hands under her arms and lifted her onto her feet, like a child. “I’ve only got one pair of needles here, and not much yarn left, but I know a store a few blocks from here.”

  
Before leaving, Natasha picked up one of the needles from the bed, and gave it an experimental twirl between her fingers. She smiled as she shut the door behind her.

****

 

 

 

The piece Clint is working on when he teaches Tasha is a pair of long finger-less gloves, for use on cold, night time stakeouts - so he can still use his bow. Pattern [here](The%20piece%20Clint%20is%20working%20on%20when%20he%20teaches%20Tasha%20is%20a%20pair%20of%20long%20finger-less%20gloves,%20for%20use%20on%20cold,%20night%20time%20stakeouts%20-%20so%20he%20can%20still%20use%20his%20bow.%20Pattern%20here).

 


	2. Vodka Cosys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so to all the people in the comment; Oh my god! I never actually knew there were so many ways to kill someone with a knitting needle! (You're fab, seriously.)

It was a week later, that Tony was trying to find someone to talk to, when he realised that none of the Avengers were in their rooms. Neither were they in the kitchen, or the labs. The training room was empty and the offices deserted. Finally, he decided to check one of the living rooms, which was rarely used on the seventh floor of the building. He opened the door, and what he saw made him briefly turn back in disbelief.

When he looked again, he saw Thor dominating one ofthe smaller sofas, a tangle of kitting between his huge hands. Clint was sat on the back of the sofa, pointing out tips to the larger man, as he nodded eagerly, and started a new row.

Steve and Bruce were sat together on the floor, next to a basket full of multicolored yarns, comparing them, passing the threads through their fingers.

And finally, to his horror, Pepper was sat with Natasha, both in arm chairs, the former with with her feet propped up on the small coffee table between her, the latter with her legs crossed, and a tangle of fine, dove grey yarn in her hands.

“Ok, I’m dreaming right? This is not happening in my living room. You cannot all knit and I’m going insane.”

Pepper laughed; “Fraid not! Come on, it’s fun.”

“No. No it isn’t. My gran used to knit, and she had no teeth. And Pep, what is that?” He strode over to where she was sitting, knitting..

“Thats a baby jumper. You’re knitting a baby jumper. Pepper, why are you doing that? Why are you knitting a baby jumper Pepper?!”

The rest of the team laughed at his panic, and the young woman swatted him away. “Oh stop it, I’m not pregnant, dumbass. It’s for my cousin, she’s due next month.”

Tony, apparently satisfied, rolled his eyes, and kissed the top of her head. “And what about you Cinderella, what have you going on over there? Is that a cobweb? I know you have like, Spider-sense of whatever, but isn’t that taking it a bit far?”

Tony made a critical mistake at this point; in the time it took for him to reach out, and try to grab the fabric from her lap, there was a flash of steel, and Tony found his sleeve impaled to the table, stuck there with a terrifyingly fine knitting needle. 

He stared at it for a moment, and attempted to pull it out. Apparently though, it was stuck about three inches into the wood of the table, and he was forced to give up. Natasha glared at him for a moment, and quickly removed it herself.

"It’s a shawl, actually. I’m making it for Jane, for her and Thor’s wedding."

“Right. Point taken. So seriously, you can all knit?”

Steve looked up at him from the floor, and nodded happily. “I learned to knit in the army actually. I must have made scarves for about half the troops.” He laughed, and it struck Tony that this was the first time he had seen Steve speak about the war without looking positively miserable.

Bruce nodded. “I learnt in India. It’s useful to knit. And well, calming, I suppose. Well, as long as you don’t attempt to do anything too ridiculous, right Tasha?” This was new as well; were they allowed to shorten Natasha’s name now?

The woman in question turned on a horrifically pleasant smile. “I’m nothing if not the best. Anyway, I taught Pep a few days ago, after Clint taught me”

“And I taught Thor this morning.” Clint was definitely looking far too pleased with himself.

“I used to watch my mother knit when my brother and I were young; it is a prized skill in Asgard! Many women are taught when they are small.” He turned his attention back to the lumpy red scarf in his lap.

"Right, fine, ok then. I know where I stand then,don’t I?” Tony picked up the needle Natasha had used to skewer him, and picked up its partner from the table, and went to sit between Bruce and Steve.

“Honey, what are you doing?” Pepper watched him across the room, waiting for him to upset someone.

“Well, if this is what you lot are going to be doing from now on, I should probably learn, shouldn’t I? Hey what do you think Fury would say to a knitted eye patch...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the link to Clint pattern is brok, so I'll put the URL here: http://www.berroco.com/exclusives/annlina/annlina_lg.html
> 
> Also, the pattern for Natasha's shawl... http://www.elann.com/Commerce.web/product_freepatterns.aspx?featuredID=126165
> 
> She learns quickly, doesn't she!  
> Also, I have actually tried knitting an eye patch before. It's pretty fun!!
> 
> So after all of the amazing comments, I'm kinda tempted to wrote en extra chapter set a few months later, where Tasha actually does kill someone with a knitting needle.... We shall see.....


End file.
